Last Week
Joe: 8-8
Aaron: 8-8
Current Standings
Joe: 20-12
Aaron: 16-16
NY Giants at Carolina
Aaron:I don't watch enough Giants games to know if last weekend's come-from-behindwin in Tampa Bay is the first ever one-game/in-game consolidation of"Elite" Eli Manning and his occasionally error-prone splitpersonality. I'm also not sure how the Giants will respond on a short weekwhile still nursing some injuries on offense. I do know I'm 0-2 on midweekpredictions, though. Pick: Carolina
Joe: Hakeem Nicks isn't playing forthe Giants, and they reeeeally looked like they should have lost that Tampagame last week. All of these things, plus the home-field-on-a-short-week thingshould add up to a Panthers upset. Oh, but what about the transitiveproperty??? New York beat Tampa Bay; Tampa Bay beat Carolina; therefore NewYork beats Carolina! When does that EVER not work in the NFL?? (Or maybe it'sjust that the Thursday games are more fun when we pick different teams.) Pick:NY Giants
St. Louis at Chicago Aaron: Look...Iknow that Bears QB Jay Cutler the perfect punching bag for alitany of reasons. But, the "sameol' Cutler" celebrations that broke out across the interwebs during lastweek's loss to Green Bay is shortsighted even by online standards. Does his pouty sourpuss really outweigh theNFC Championship game and 7-4 record-before-he-got-hurt-last-year on hisresume? Pick: Chicago
Joe: You'll have to bear with me, as I'm nursing injuries from being trampledby the stampede of fantasy owners to pick up St. Louis's Danny Amendola. I lostout, so I'll have to console myself with him going 4-37 this week. I like theRams, actually. But they're still figuring some stuff out, and I think theBears in Chicago on three extra days' rest will be okay. Pick:Chicago
Buffalo at Cleveland Aaron: Let's go ahead and set theover/under for the number of national sports columnists who'll use this game asthe foundation for a 1,200-word piece on the disappearance of sepia-toned,old-timey Pleasantville America at 2.5. 5.5 if either team plays the Lions later thisseason. Pick: Buffalo
Joe: Ugh. I hate road games againstteams you *should* beat. I couldn't be happier with what we've seen out of CJSpiller, but thus far he's the ONLY thing happening on the Bills' offense, andI worry what'll happen when teams figure that out. Pick:Cleveland
Tampa Bayat Dallas
Aaron: Forget the season-opening winagainst the Giants and last week's loss to the Seahawks. THIS will be the gamethat tells us what kind of team the Cowboys are. An eminently beatable opponent at home? The champion of the NFC East will need tofeast on the league's entrails in order to reach the nine wins needed toconquer this division. Pick:Dallas
Joe: Tampa's been unexpectedly toughthus far, and they should've beaten the Giants last week. But the Cowboys willprobably do this win one/lose one/win one thing all season. Pick:Dallas
NY Jetsat Miami
Aaron: Dolphins RB Reggie Bush won'tbenefit from the Raiders benevolent run defense this week. But, while the Jets are undeniably the betterteam, I think this one ends up a lot closer when it goes final. Jets QB Mark Sanchez has been accused ofeverything else in his tenure, so is there any chance we can get "playsdown to the level of his competition" in the mix for next Monday'sESPN First Take? Pick: NY Jets
Joe: It's weird, the Jets looked SO goodin the first quarter against the Steelers and then seemed to just ... stop.Three more quarters this time, guys! Pick: NY Jets
San Francisco at Minnesota
Aaron: I've been indifferent towardsthe 49ers since Deion Sanders' lone season in San Francisco nearly 20 (!) yearsago. I kinda doubtthis season will end with a glorious shellacking of the SanDiego Chargers in the Super Bowl, but a few more weeks at this level and Icould be talked into the Niners shellacking someone comeFebruary. Pick: SanFrancisco
Joe: From the way Cris Collinsworthwas talking during last week's handling of the Lions, the Niners already HAVEshellacked someone in the Super Bowl come February. I wasn't expecting suchprolific butt-kissing from a guy whose career pinnacle was losing to those same49ers in the Super Bowl. Pick: San Francisco
Kansas City at New Orleans
Aaron: Incompetent Chiefs head coachRomeo Crennel went 24-40 while leading the Browns from 2005-08. He went 2-1 as interim head coach of theChiefs last year and was rewarded with a three-year contract. If this isn't discussed during one of nextmonth's presidential debates, I will be very disappointed in you, America. Pick: New Orleans
Joe: The Bills offense put 35 on theChiefs last week. Don't embarrass yourself and fall short of that, Drew Brees!Pick: New Orleans
Cincinnati at Washington
Aaron: I'm old enough to remember whenthe Redskins had one of the largest national followings in all of sports backin the early 1980s. I dunno if RobertGriffin III will ever approach the organic popularity of Theismann, Riggins, the"Smurfs" and the "Hogs", but I'm a sucker for theelectricity that a player like Griffin can inject into a devoted fanbase. It's finna be loud,Bengals. Pick:Washington
Joe: Does it have to be theRedskins fans who get to be so injected? They're just soinsufferable when they're winning, and for a team thathasn't won much lately, you'd think they'd be out of practice. Slow down,dudes, you're 1-1. Pick: Washington
Detroit at Tennessee
Aaron: Perhaps I'm in the minority,but I'm not ready to place Lions QB Matt Stafford alongside Ben Roethlisbergerin the pantheon of great swollen-faced signal-callers just yet. The 49ers look like a VERY good team, but italso appeared that the Lions offense turned off the urgency and took severalplays off in the second half of their loss last week. The Titans are a VERY bad team, so... Pick: Detroit
Joe: You think you're in the minority?After these last two weeks of Stafford incompetence. JUST THROW SOME STUPIDTOUCHDOWNS, YOU ASS! Pick: Tennessee
Jacksonville at Indianapolis
Aaron: The Jags and Colts both put up23 points against the Vikings this season while allowing 26 and 20 toMinnesota, respectively. So...what's itall mean? It means another week oflimited regional TV coverage for all teams involved and that I won't learn thefinal score until I'm doing my picks for next week. Pick:Indianapolis
Joe: Andrew Luck, people! This ishappening! Pick: Indianapolis
Philadelphia at Arizona
Aaron: Like the rest of you, in lieuof any actual analysis on Cardinals games, I'm looking forward to several moreweeks of pithy bitchiness directed towards Arizona WR Larry Fitzgerald and hisdeleterious impact on my fantasy football team's chances. Pick: Arizona
Joe: 3-0 Arizona Cardinals? I don'tthink any of us are remotely ready for that. Pick: Philadelphia
Atlantaat San Diego
Aaron: Chargers fans here in San Diegodon't wanna hear none of your triflin' mess about how their football teamhasn't defeated a team with a win yet. They're 2-0, so shut your stupid face, HATER! And, you just can't argue with insight likethat, yo. Pick: Atlanta
Joe: "Hasn't defeated a team witha win yet"? In week 3? That is adorable. First team to learn what a runninggame is wins. Pick: San Diego
Houstonat Denver
Aaron: Safe to say Peyton Manning'sright arm is the quickest "dead, resurrected, dead again" storylinein more than 25 years. The record isstill held by the "Dark Awakening" episode of the Generation OneTransformers cartoon when Optimus Prime is brought back to life. OR WAS HE? No. He dies again in the end. I just told you. Pick: Houston
Joe: Houston's fed on the league'sworst teams to start the season, but Miami has a win so I guess that makes themlegit! (Sorry, sorry, but ... man, I like this line of analysis!) Pick:Houston
Pittsburgh at Oakland
Aaron: No rhyme. No reason. I thinkOakland wins a low-scoring, ugly affair full of field goals from the infielddirt, incomplete passes and five or six shots of fans fighting in thestands. Pick: Oakland
Joe: Pittsburgh's kind of asking forit this season. I would LOVE to make this upset pick too, but I am just toomuch of a chicken. Pick: Pittsburgh
New England at Baltimore
Aaron: The argument for picking thePatriots seems to be "New England will NOT lose two in a row". This kind of wishcasting conveniently sweepslast week's loss at home to an NFC West team that'snot San Francisco under the rug. That's a LOT of italics, I'm just saying. Pick: Baltimore
Joe: Baltimore SHOULD have beaten NewEngland in the AFC Championship game last year, and in this world, wrongs areALWAYS righted. Pick: Baltimore
Green Bayat Seattle
Aaron: One of these weeks, the Packersare going to re-establish their dominance Oz-style. And, God help whoever's on the receiving endof that shiv. Pick: GreenBay
Joe: What's the over/under on how longit'll take everyone to figure out if Seattle is any good or not? Week 9? Week13? Pick: Green Bay
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